Fixing (complaining about) Arrow and the DCTV-verse

I wouldn’t bother writing about Arrow, Flash, Supergirl or any of the DC Comics family of shows if I didn’t care. I do. I’ve loved these characters my entire life and I want these shows to succeed.

That said, the DCTV-verse is a dumpster fire. And it all starts with Arrow.

Oliver, the titular character on Arrow, needs the most work. Nary an episode goes by in which he’s not undermined by his underlings; blaming himself for ____________ problem of the week; questioning whether or not the ‘darkness’ inside him is too great to overcome; contemplating quitting his career as Green Arrow; lecturing us about gun control or any number of liberal causes; and pining over some terrible, whiny, duplicitous, undermining, emasculating girlfriend. Oliver needs to be a strong, decisive leader. No sane person goes years ‘finding themselves’ and making peace with their past without making any progress whatsoever. He’s been stuck in a ‘poor me’ rut for five years now. It needs to stop.

Ollie’s gal-pal Felicity. Good golly. I despise Felicity. Her entire existence seems to revolve around whining about her on-again-off-again relationship with Oliver, undermining him (in front of the team) as leader at every opportunity, and explaining any technical issues that may arise.

And Mr. Terrific. He’s literally a whiny, self-righteous, self-important, techy-nerd, carbon copy of Felicity. Unless there’s a plan to turn him evil at some point, he’s completely redundant. He’s just doubles the annoying factor. The dude literally announces his sexual orientation at least once an episode, and uses his relationship with his ex-husband as an excuse to interrupt every team meeting and boo-hoo about his feelings. He’s useless in the field or in the office and a disruptive element to the team as a whole. He needs to go. Or turn evil.

Diggle. The butt-kicking dude-bro you want to love. But can’t. Because he’s always quitting the team or nursing his feels.

Everyone else. Arrow has a whole slew of allies and enemies past and present. Some are awesome, like Black Canary, Speedy and Huntress. The rest are pretty much the current cast of feelings-heavy losers. I have no idea why fan-favorite characters have been brushed aside for the new guys, but Arrow would be well-served to reevaluate it’s roster of heroes ASAP.

General DCTV-verse nonsense. There’s so much of it that I can’t possibly touch on it all here, but I’ll include a few examples:

The doppelganger villains. All of the DC shows are guilty of this sin. Seemingly every season, our heroes are resigned to fighting doppelgangers of themselves in a black costume – that’s how you know they’re evil. It’s the kind of thing you usually see when writers are out ideas, except this has literally been going on since day one.

In the very first episode of Supergirl, Kara flew up to a missile, landed on it, and then struggled to crawl several feet to an access panel in order to disable it. Why? No one knows. She can fly. She could have flown all the way to the panel. She also has super-strength, so the struggle-crawl makes no sense either. The logic has only gotten worse from there.

On Legends of Tomorrow, the first season revolved around killing nearly immortal big bad, Vandal Savage. To accomplish this feat, they needed to stab him with a magic-infused knife. After chasing Vandal through time and space for three-quarters of the season, the Legends had him incapacitated, had the knife a few feet away, and then… just left. They could have finished him off, but nope. No reason was given. They simply shrugged and said they’ll get him some other day. Legends also the bad habit of playing free and loose with the sexual orientation of every woman Sara encounters throughout history. Not only is it historically inaccurate (the number one sin a time travel show can commit is not being historically accurate, as half the fun is seeing how the cast interacts with authentic people, places and technology not of their era) it’s insulting when beloved characters like Guinevere – portrayed as King Arthur’s wife and a member of a Christian order in the show – cheats on her husband with Sara without so much as a pause to consider her actions. It just wouldn’t happen.

Finally, The Flash, which was actually a pretty fun show in the beginning, has devolved into EVERYONE whining about EVERYTHING. By the time everyone in the cast has had a chance to complain about their relationships, bad choices and guilt, the episode is over. And then it starts all over again the next week. There’s barely five minutes a week left for sci-fi fist-fisticuffs and fun. Also, there was a musical episode.

‘Nuff said.

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