The world has lost it’s collective mind.
Up is down. Good is evil. Cats are marrying dogs. Heck, people are marrying dogs.
Laws are created and enforced based not upon logic, reason and facts, but feelings.
What is a reasonable person to do in such a topsy-turvy bizzaro-world? Well, out crazy the crazies, of course!
Can’t afford university? Simple. Identify as *REDACTED* and enjoy the many perks and benefits not afforded to other Canadians – including free university!
Or maybe you’re having a hard time landing a job? Not a problem. Identify as a disabled, female, “person of color,” and enjoy front of the line consideration for job openings. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise, call them a racist, kick their ass, and claim you’re part of a SJW “Civil Rights Movement” – those dudes can get away with anything.
Got drunk and ran some poor fool down? Worry not. Claim drunk driving is part of your religion. If it works for rape and wife beating and pedophilia and theft and murder, so hit-and-runs shouldn’t be an issue.
Poor? Pfft. Give me a hard one. Identify as a millionaire and demand the government adjust your bank account to reflect your delusions… err… deeply held, sincere beliefs.
Looking old and run down? Identify as 21 and demand regular plastic surgery revisions to reflect your “true” age.
Tired of life as an adult? Identify as eleven and demand to be placed with a (very) Liberal foster family.
Long line at the bathroom, fella? No worries. Since we can now change our gender at will, feel free to sashay into the nearest ladies room and scar some chicks for life.
Heck, claim you’re a freaking alien/elf hybrid from beyond the stars and begin making delusional demands all over town. If anyone calls you on your nonsense, refuses to bake you a pro-trans-species marriage cake, or fails to use your “preferred pronouns,” claim to be the victim of white supremacists, Christian bigots, science deniers, elf/alien-phobes, contact the media, and sue them for everything they’ve got. You may even get you’re own reality show out of it!